Review #57 - Restoration (1995)

From the back of the box: "Meg Ryan and Robert Downey, Jr. head a superb cast of stars in this stylish and provocative story of love, power and seduction! Robert Merivel (Downey) is a young man who seems to have everything...until a passionate affair leads to scandal, suddenly leaving him heartbroken and penniless. But it's only after losing it all that Merivel discovers who he really is and - with the love of a beautiful woman (Ryan) - becomes the man he could never dreamed he could be! Also featuring Sam Neill and Hugh Grant, this critically acclaimed and entertaining motion picture won two 1995 Academy Awards for Best Achievement in Art Direction and Costume Design!"

Exclamation points? Dude, really?? Those were not my doing, I assure you. That's really how it's written on the box.

I tried soooo hard to like this film. Really, I did. When it came in the mail today, I showed it off to my coworkers like it was a little cocker spaniel puppy. "Look what I get to watch! Doesn't it look GOOD?!" And I love period pieces. So I was excited to use the VCR tonight for the first time in at least a year.

At first glance, it reminded me of a made-for-TV BBC film with extra nudity. The credits, music, everything smacks of "TV movie." Maybe a nice 3-night miniseries on Masterpiece Theater. I was actually cool with that; far be it from me to be a cinematic snob.

I would say it "lost steam" after the first 20 minutes, but that would be to insinuate that any such steam existed in the first place. It was 118 minutes long, which ya could have fooled me, because it felt like a 2 1/2 hour movie. Seriously. It completely lacked any focus as it droned on...and on...and on. It actually reminded me of Chaplin in that way.

I know - I did it again. Trashed Chaplin. Please forgive.

Anyhow, I am now the proud owner of a VHS tape of Restoration. If you so desire, you may borrow it. Keep it for as long as you want. If your VCR eats the tape, no worries. I'm okay with that.

On the tape jacket, it says that Siskel and Ebert gave this "two thumbs up." They fail to mention that they are referring to Jack Siskel and Tom Ebert, the costuming guys.

I give it a 6 for being dull...long...booooorrring.